Sunday, January 7

Kissing boys as social action.

Last night, my friend Dave called to see if I wanted to go see a singer/songwriter he likes perform at a club in my neighborhood. So I said yes, and we went. Dave said he liked this singer/songwriter because he writes charmingly self-deprecating songs about dating boys, which is a very Dave thing to like.

We went to the show, and Dave was right; this guy reminded me of a homo Jason Mraz -- this simple, golden-voiced guy singing witty lyrics about semi-requited love affairs. It got me thinking, because his songs had all the mainstream appeal of a Jason Mraz tune, only they were songs sung by a guy that were casually--effortlessly--about gay relationships. If this guy had an album, it would be a big "thing," for, well, that very reason.

Which brought my thoughts to another place. I have this website about my work as a writer, and on it there's the smallest, most casual comment that reveals that I date boys. Which to me is no big deal, because, it's, like, who I am. My Dad, who's something of a closet conservative (sorry, Dad!), made a big stink about this little comment when I launched my website--out of love, surely, but a stink nonetheless. And I remember thinking, is this really such a big deal?

Call me naive, but when the "issue" of gay marriage first came to the forefront a couple years ago, I literally laughed out loud when I heard about it, because it was such a no-brainer to me. I thought, is this really an issue for people? You must be joking! It's such a non-issue.

Shows how much I know.

Which brings me to my conclusion of the day: that, in this day in age, the simplest act of writing a song, or being who you are without fear or apology, can be a statement without you even realizing it. To treat something as a non-issue, as a casual fact, can be a meaningful and political gesture. It's kind of disheartening to realize this, but also sort of empowering. I mean, what better, easier, more meaningful way to change the world than simply by being?

If it's a powerful thing to be casual and comfortable about who I am, I'm happy to do it. Take that, world!


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