Monday, January 22

Brilliant or bollocks?

We're going to play a new game I've just made up. It's called "Brilliant or Bollocks?"

I turned on the TV to zone out a bit before bed, and the picture lights up to some Hilary Duff movie. I watched approximately 7 seconds of the movie and got the whole movie, beginning, middle, end. The 7 seconds went something like this:

**TV comes on**

Hilary's just told off Chad Michael Murray, in a locker room, surrounded by the semi-dressed high school football team. Hilary storms out, parting the sea of Chad's shocked-and-awed teammates, as Chad calls out Hilary's character's name (I can't remember what it is), and then angrily punches at a locker when she doesn't turn around.

Cut to: Hilary exiting the boys' locker room, indicating with an outtake of breath and a roll of the eyes that she had just been Very Brave to do whatever it was she just did. A figure comes running down the hallway: it's a skinny boy in glasses who says something like, "They told me I'd find you here, and I thought you could use a friend," giving her a great big hug.

**Adam changes the channel.**

OK, in 7 seconds I knew the entire plot of the movie. As a musical theater writer, I'm always striving toward the ultimate in conciseness (concise-ity?) in my writing. Sometimes you've got to tell a person's whole life story in a single song. 7 seconds? That's pretty damn concise.

But then, again, it's a Hilary Duff movie.

Brilliant or bollocks?

(Also, Hilary Duff's a really poor actress; I got that in 7 seconds as well.)

2 Comments:

Blogger Liz said...

Bollocks! Can't wait to play the live version with you.

9:31 AM  
Blogger Murphy Jacobs said...

I'll go with bollocks. The tip off was "Hillary Duff Movie". Unfortunately for her, she will never be her generation's Pia Zadora.

12:42 PM  

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